Dream Big!

When we rely on other people for our happiness, we give away our power. There are people out there whether they be family, friends, acquaintances or co-workers who will be more than happy to take what you are offering only to offer nothing in return. Sometimes these lessons can be painful to learn; but they are necessary for our own soul growth.

If you would indulge me a few minutes, I would like to tell you about my own personal experience.

For those who know me, the past 18 months has been one roller coaster of a ride. I have been through grief, loss, sadness, job loss, financial loss as well as a host of health problems. There were times that I didn't think I could go on and I am ashamed to say that the thought of finding a quick exit was something that popped into my mind more than once.

Through all of this heartache over the past 18 months, I changed. I became more withdrawn, was afraid to leave my safe haven of home, experienced debilitating anxiety and panic attacks as well as losing interest in most things that used to bring me joy. I was becoming agoraphobic, suffering from PTSD and I never thought my life would be normal again. I had this unbearable anger and sadness inside that kept eating at me like a corrosive material. And, as much as I thought I had it 'beaten', in the end, I was powerless.

Some people turn to drugs or alcohol. I did neither. I did something just as badly though. I turned that anger and sadness inward and mentally and emotionally beat myself up until I didn't recognize who I was any longer. From the outside, I looked ok. From those around me, I looked as if I was coping fairly well. But in the dark days and nights of this sadness, devoid of joy, I was alone with this unbearable pain. I had forgotten about the dream. About my promise to God.

Before all of this, I enjoyed my healing practice. I took classes, facilitated classes, mentored people, etc. I felt so good about what I did that I never thought about myself. I never realized that by not giving to myself, I was giving away my power. Sooner or later, when we don't refill our reserve tanks, they run empty. We give and give and give until there is nothing left and then the people we gave too are so used to us giving, that when we no longer can, their true colors show. The neediness, the selfishness and the 'what about me' is all you hear. After awhile, you shut down. The pain is so unbearable that you can't function.

As time went on this past few months, I realized that my body was engergetically holding onto so much. I refused to be a victim of this and sought emotional freedom. Much like how a sponge gets full and soggy when it can no longer absorb; so was my emotional and physical self. I knew I had to seek professional help. I had a great support system with my husband and close friends, but I needed someone who could help me un-learn the behaviors I had grown accustomed to.

I have started to find my voice again. I have found that little voice inside that is screaming for love, but no longer acceptance. I see the light at the end of the tunnel for the things that once brought me so much immense joy. That scared little girl with all this anger and sadness has become more empowered; I realize that I don't need validation or permission in my life. I have broken the cycle of guilt, or feeling that I need to 'fix' people; of being liked. It has taken me 40 years, but I have finally stepped into my power and I am ready to Dream Big. I have learned that I cannot change other peoples opinions of me and that if I don't love who I am, then others will not learn or know how to love me back.

I vigourously look forward to continue regaining the self-love, self-acceptance and the work that God, the Angels and the Universe entrusted to me. I am remembering WHO I am, WHY I am here and WHAT I need to do.

I look forward to the re-awakening of my life's passions and joy as never before! I look forward to re-establishing my healing practice and teaching others through life's examples. Through all of this, I heard a song called "Dream Big" by Katrina Elam and if you listen to the words to that song, it talks about waiting for the gift because its worth the wait. I'm grateful to have had this time to heal my own life and to share this journey with you.

As I sit and write this and truly feel so free for the first time in many months, I am inspired to continue living an empowered, enlightened and inspired life!

My nugget of wisdom for you is this: don't be afraid to be who YOU are; don't be afraid to Dream Big! When we allow FEAR to rule our life, when we allow others opinions and judgement of us to rule us, we give away that power.

Reclaim your power and let your light shine bright!

Dream Big; Your dreams just might come true.
Donna